Bothered brides

the short version is my so called mother in law thinks her son deserves better calls me a cheater guilt trips her son and makes our lives a living hell by harrassing phone calls, texts, emails and on facebook. she has also turned his entire family againist us and no one has bothered to conract us since we have gotten engaged. my question is do i even bother to invite his mother, nan and pop ( they are the main problems) and other members of his family such as cousin uncles and aunties who have made us miserable for over 6 months now?

That must be horrible for you… but I honestly think that might be your fiances decision. If he wants his family to be there on his wedding day, no matter what horrible things they have done they unfortunately they will have to be there.

Has he spoken to his mum about her behaviour?

Discuss the situation with him and find out who he wants to invite.

best of luck

i think its the right thing to do to invite them, especially his mother and nan and pop, the last thing you want to do is give them more reasons to make your life hell, its their decision to come or not, and if they make a scene its embarresing on them, unfortunatly your the one whose going to remember it forever, just try your best to fix things between you and them, if not for your sake, for you FH

goodluck

i agree with the girls comments

what’s your FH take on the situation? this is an issue that you need to discuss between yourselves and then discuss with his family – sit down, face to face, mature grown up discussion. limits need to be set so that everyone is aware of what is and isn’t acceptable.

good luck!

he has warned them all long ago that if they continue with this behaviour that they wont be invited. i offered an olive branch to the family and they told me to f… off and stick it. he wont say yes or no he is confused cause he knows where i stand and he knows that they will probably make a scene and he does nto want to have to ask them to leave. I just dont want to invite them and that be the only thing if they do do something to be the thing that is remebered the most about our day. thanks.

I think you should be the bigger person and hold your head high whilst inviting them.

Take the high road, be the adult and always smile! For 2 reasons:

1) it makes them look crazier

2) it is the classy thing to do

I think the even bigger issue here is that your FH needs to put HIS family in their place.

He is the one that needs to put his foot down not you and let them know this has to stop.

This is an awful situation but it seems you’re taking on all of this stress when it’s not even your own family and you have bigger things to worry about then keeping crazies in line!

I say invite them, with a smile and give them the opportunity to either grow up or be the final straw.

OMG girl, that is a horrible situation you find youself in. Unfortunatly, and i know you probably dont what to hear it, i have to agree with the other girls. Invite them, then the ball is in their court. I would, however, have some big burly men that are either friends or your family on stand-by incase they do start something so that they can escort them out. Its handy as well of they decline to attend but then gatecrash. Or you can hire professional security, just make sure they are licensed in case said people attempt legal action. Whatever happenes, remember that your wedding day is for you and FH and dont let ANYTHING they say or do spoil it for you.

I really feel for you. I have a similar situation where it’s my oldest brother and sister not accepting my FH, they have done some of the most unthinkable things to tear us apart, they haven’t succeeded.

It’s also difficult when my FH parents have recently spilt and now not having to invite his mother for the sake of having a nice wedding day.

It really makes you think why should I invite people that don’t support us? At the end of the day, the are still family, invite them, if they cause trouble get someone you can trust to remove them from your special day, in my case my uncle will do wonders for security lol. It’s the right thing to do, even if they are idiots, you know you have been the bigger person in the situation and done the right thing