Bothered brides

From what little exp I’ve had with weddings, it’s good to know what you want. things like reception, ceramony, budget, dates. We only got engaged on the 14th on feb 2012. I know the wedding won’t be for about two years, due to FH teying to see his children dealing with lawyers, his ex wife will want a settlement and such (he won’t let go of his assets) I’ve started saving, he can’t save because of lawyers and such we’ve talked about location a bit, just FRUSTRATING. anyone else have simmilar problems?

Estelle, I know EXACTLY what you mean. My wedding is still over 2 years away but FH thinks I am being a bridezilla because I want to allocate our budget and pick colours (we have our date and venue). He seems to think that we can plan it all in a week. Men simply dont understand just how much planning goes into a wedding day, or how long it takes to order things etc. MEN!!!

Just breathe and explain to him that you want your wedding to be perfect and that you are simply getting ideas of what you like.

My FH spent about 6 months saying it was too soon to set a date, blah blah blah. Then I made him understand that in wedding speak, you need to be prepared, and can usually never be too early! After a cooling off period (we had our engagement party 6 months after our engagement) he surprised me by being excited about picking a date. He will now talk about it to me (as long as I don’t go on for hours about it!). He is happy to talk about booze/food/music/cars, but invitations/dresses are off limits! 

Heh, I know exactly what you’re talking about. Myself & FH got engaged on November 5TH 2011, we had our engagement party on December 10th 2011, he wanted to party early lol.

So we’ve now been engaged for 6 months. I have tried for many months to try and pick a date etc, but he just thinks i’m being stupid and thinks it can be planned in a matter of 2 weeks, he seriously thinks that lol.

We finally sat down the other night, and he’s saying he wants to get married November 2012, which is only 6-7 months away. I don’t know if I can do it in that time, but once again, i’ve started to talk about who we’re going to have in our bridal party, what colours/theme, what’s our budget etc etc, and he won’t have a bar of it, because he thinks I can plan it just like that!!!!

IT’S DRIVING ME NUTS!!! The only thing he’s interested in is the DJ & the photographer, which is fine. I just NEED him to at least talk about a few things etc.

So yes, I know how you feel!! You’re not alone

xoxo

Hi Estelle,

Ive been married for just over a month now and trust me, from experience you definitely need to plan early. A lot of places are booked out 18mths to 2years in advance…some longer for the busy months! We booked our reception venue 16mths ahead and we were lucky as the venue only had two dates left in march (one was only available due to a cancellation already). The ceremony venue was the same. Our budget was to be under 20,000 for the actual wedding day so we booked early to make sure we could get the places we wanted, so that we werent left booking somewhere either expensive or not as nice.

Maybe show your fiance a few places and explain that they have to be booked 18mths out. Might help to push things along. At worst some places dont mind if you change the date if due to his circumstances things need to be pushed back a little.

If anything I recommend booking the ceremony and reception venues very early, and then probably the photographer (as the really good ones are often booked out early too and if this is an important aspect as it was for me then definitely choose and book early). If you are 2yrs away then thats ok. Maybe for now just research everything on your own, print out some of your favourite venue options that suit your budget, etc and in a few months start showing him and seeing what he thinks. Men are more visual so maybe having it all for him to see might help.

Hope this helps

Jess x