Engagement Party Planning Checklist

The engagement party is the big kickoff to this exciting year (or so) and is completely optional. Traditionally, the bride’s parents host the initial gathering, but the groom’s parents can throw their own party, both sets can host one joint celebration, or your wedding party can take up the planning reins. Here’s what you need to do:

[ ] Decide on a Date

This won’t be a surprise party, so give the hosts a few days to choose from, no more than three months after the marriage proposal.

[ ] Share Your Guest List

Know that everyone who’s invited to the engagement party should ultimately be invited to the wedding. That said, if you’re having a small wedding and want to throw an extravagant engagement party, go for it. Just be sure to let people know that the wedding will be small, so no feelings will be hurt when party guests aren’t invited to the wedding. And, to diffuse sentiments that this party’s purpose is to receive gifts, make sure the hosts include a nice note in the invitation that requests no presents.

[ ] Register!

It’s smart to register for some items to give the guests an idea of what fits your style.

[ ] Prepare to Toast

You don’t need to rehearse anything. Just know that you should raise a glass to your hosts and guests, thanking them all for coming. Get used to it — you’ll be toasting them again at most prewedding events.

[ ] Keep Track of Gifts

Create a guest list spreadsheet to keep tabs of who gave what. That way, when the gifts start arriving, you’ll be able to send out thank you notes right away.

Excerpted from The Knot Book of Wedding Lists, published by Random House Australia/Publishers